Deir El-Balah, Gaza Strip - Jehad al-Alsar left Deir El-Balah's tent in central Gaza early in the morning for a new and weary journey to buy food for his family.
His destination was Wednesday: Aid allocation point in Rafa, run by the U.S.-backed Gaza Humanitarian Foundation (GHF).
Jehad walked 10 km (6.2 miles) of "hard" (6.2 miles), mainly caused by the responsibility of his pregnant wife and two hungry daughters.
With the direct result of Israel's months of blockade on the territory, hunger spreading to Gaza, the GHF website is Yehad's only hope.
Despite the controversy, the group resigned on Sunday, saying the GHF could not “comply with humanitarian principles, neutrality, justice and independence.”
On Tuesday, the GHF lacked experience in handling aid allocations, when at least three Palestinians were killed in the chaos surrounding relief efforts.
But in Gaza, people are hungry and desperate. Yehad is one of them.
After a 90-minute walk, the 31-year-old and thousands of others suddenly opened before reaching the iron gate of the distribution center.
"The crowds poured in - thousands of people. There was no order at all," Yehard told Al Jazeera. “People rushed to the yard where the aid boxes were stacked and moved into the interior lobby where there was more supplies.”
Yehad added: "It's a real struggle. Men, women, children, are all huddled together and try to grab everything. There's no line, no system - just hunger and chaos."
Inside the hall, people snatched everything they could carry. “Anyone who can lift two boxes.
"There is no trace of humanity," he said. "I was almost crushed by the crowd."
The distance was only a short distance, and the armed foreign troops stood and watched without intervening. Yehad said he approached one of them and faced him.
"I told them, 'You are not helping - you are supervising the famine. You should leave. You don't need to be here.'"
Jehad managed to retrieve only a few items: a can of tuna, a small bag of sugar, some pasta and a pack of cookies scattered on the ground. He took them into a plastic bag, tied them along his shoulders, and returned home on a long journey.
"I only have one point. I'm afraid to stay longer and get trampled in the trampled place - but I have to bring back something. My girl needs a meal. I have no choice."
When he returned to the tent, his daughters greeted him happily-even the little he brought.
"My wife and I split the food we brought home so that the kids could eat within a few days. We often skip meals. The kids can't stand this... I take the full responsibility of feeding them."
Awad Abu Khalil was also one of the desperate crowds on Wednesday. The 23-year-old described the crowd rushing to go to the food as "apocalypse".
"Everyone is running. That's chaos. Aid piles up, everyone attacks it, grabs their possibilities."
Awad said he heard gunfire in the distance, probably targeting young people trying to bypass the designated route.
He expressed deep frustration at the staff. “I hope American employees can distribute assistance on the table and give everyone a share of it to everyone, not this crazy.”
Images that appeared on Tuesday and Wednesday added fuel to international criticism of the GHF, with representatives from several countries condemning Israel’s decision to prevent the United Nations and international humanitarian organizations from bringing aid to Gaza.
Israel stopped Gaza’s aid to enter Gaza in early March, while a ceasefire is still underway. It has since unilaterally broken the ceasefire and doubled in the war against Gaza, with the official death toll now exceeding 54,000 Palestinians.
“We have received assistance from international institutions and from the United Nations,” Yehad said. “It was delivered in an organized manner under the name – no chaos, no humiliation.”
By the end of Wednesday, the Gaza government's media office reported that at least 10 Palestinians who were eager to seek assistance had been killed by Israeli forces in the past 48 hours.
Both Awad and Jehad can bring some food home.
Yehad said his wife and mother made bread with pasta, soaked it and kneaded it into dough. His wife made a simple pudding for the children with candy. He said he will return on Thursday.
Even for most people in Gaza, this is better than it.
Walaa Abu Sa'da has three children. Her youngest is only 10 months old.
The 35-year-old couldn't help but watch people return to the displacement camp in Al-Mawasi in Khan Younis, where her children starved to death, so she decided to go to Rafah alone.
"I fight with my husband who refuses to worry about the (Israel) army. I swear I will go by myself," Wora told Al Jazeera.
She entrusts the child to her sister, along with the crowds who are often distributed.
"My kids are on the verge of starvation. There is no milk, no food, and even no baby formula. They cry day and night, and I have to beg my neighbors to do the scrap bag," she said. "So I went, no matter what my husband thinks."
But by the time we get to Walaa to Rafah, it’s too late.
"People are fighting for something that is almost nothing. Some people are tearing the package apart," she said.
Walaa came out empty-handed. On the way back she saw a man dropping a bag of flour from the torn package.
"I picked it up and asked if I could have it," she said. "He shouted, 'I came all the way to (Gaza) from Beit Lahiya in the north to get this. I have nine children all hungry. Sorry, sister, I can't let it go," he left.
"I understand, but his words disturbed me. I cried for my own changes."
Walaa deeply humiliated the experience. She was full of shame and inferiority.
"I kept covering my face with a scarf. I didn't want anyone to recognize that I was going to get a food package," said Walaa, a bachelor's degree teacher in geography.
Despite her grief, Wolla said she would do it again if needed.
"When your child cries out from hunger, there is no dignity. We won't forgive those who allow us to achieve this."