Dave Chappelle took to the Studio 8H stage for the first New Year's episode of Saturday Night Live, his fourth time hosting the show.
He walked on stage in a suit, smoking a cigarette, and said, "Kid, I'm telling you something. I'm being honest. I'm in trouble tonight. It started in October. Lorne Michaels called me."
Chappelle recounted how he was asked to host the show. “The first episode after the election,” Chappelle recalled. "I was like, no, I'm cool." He described how he asked Michaels to "save the date closest to January 6th."th. "You know what? I can get away with all these old Trump jokes. I'll do it!" The comedian paused and said, "The minute I said yes, L.A. was on fire!
Chappelle, who is known for his controversial jokes, including about transgender people, said: "I'm tired of being controversial. I'm trying to turn over a new leaf. It's not the time to joke about a disaster like this." Too early. This one is close to home.”
Chappelle rattled off the names of actors he had worked with, such as Dennis Quaid, who had been affected by the ongoing fires in Los Angeles. "It breaks my heart," Chappelle said. He noticed all the negative comments online about celebrities losing their homes. "You see there? That's why I hate poor people," Chappelle said with a laugh. “Because they can’t see their pain.
"On the news the other day, they were saying these fires were the most expensive tragedy that's ever happened in the history of the United States. I think that's because Angelenos have good stuff. I could burn 40,000 acres in Mississippi for six or seven dollars," Chappell said. He also speculated on different conspiracy theories about the cause of the fire. "If you're a rational thinking person, you have to at least consider the possibility that God hates these people," Chappelle joked.
Chappell, sitting on a stool smoking a cigarette, continued: "A lot of poor people were affected, too. A lot of them found out the week of the fire that they lost their fire insurance. Luigi was like, 'You're welcome.'" He pivoted Asked Luigi Mangione, "That kid almost planned a perfect crime. The only thing he forgot about was shaving off his eyebrows."
Chappelle, who lives in Ohio, spoke about comments Donald Trump made last year in Springfield, Ohio, about Haitians. "Trump is a wild man. He said Haitians in Springfield, Ohio were eating people's dogs and cats. I live a town away from Springfield. This is not Springfield at all What happened." Chappelle shared how he wanted to offer support following these comments. “Every day I would drive to Springfield and have lunch at a Haitian restaurant.” He paused, then said, “I honestly don’t know what the meat was. But whatever it was, it fell off the bone. ”
"Being famous isn't fun anymore," said the comedian, who compared being famous to storming the beaches of Normandy and losing a comrade in battle. He talked about "Puffy" and the accusations surrounding Diddy. "A lot of my friends ask me, they say, Dave, you know those Freak Off parties[that Dee Dee hosted]?" Chappelle smiled.
Later, he said he wasn't invited to the party because, "Oh my god, I'm ugly! That's a hard way to find out." He continued, "Can you imagine if you were me, reading the newspaper and finding out : Is everyone in Hollywood having an orgy behind your back?”
Noting Donald Trump's inauguration on Monday, Chappelle said: "Here's the thing: On Monday, Donald Trump will be back. It will be 47th president. All flags were flown at half-staff due to the death of Jimmy Carter. Chappelle then told a story about Carter seeing a photo of people cheering for the former president in Palestine, saying, "The photo brought tears to my eyes." "
Chappelle said that while he wasn't sure Carter was a good president, "he was a good man. It made me proud to see that."
Chappelle ended the unusually long monologue by saying: "The presidency is not for little people. Donald Trump, I know you watch this show, man, remember whether people vote for you or not, they're counting on you. ”
He wished Trump good luck, "The whole world is counting on you. Please do better next time." Chappelle concluded emotionally: "Don't forget the humanity of the displaced, whether they are in the Palisade Still in Palestine.”
Watch his monologue below: